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Sunday, March 13, 2011

Everybody Loves Christie (By Scott Lamb)

This post is by Scott not Christie. Yes….I know it may be strange for a man to be posting on the family blog but I decided I would do it anyways. Let me explain the motivation for my willingness to post even if it means risking a piece of my manhood. I view the blog as a way for our children to get to know Christie and me before we become old, wrinkly, and incoherent. After reading through the posts of Christie sharing with the world all my good qualities (and I thank her for her crafty editing), I thought it would be a tragedy for me to not share how I and the world feel about Christie. To sum it up in a sentence I would say without a doubt that….Everybody Loves Christie.


Let me start off with some antidotal evidence I have witnessed firsthand. In January our new addition Gabby J arrived. We were fortunate enough to have Gabby’s newborn pictures taken a week after she was born. As any proud parents would do, we plastered our little girl’s face all over the internet via Facebook. As I got ten maybe fifteen comments on Facebook I was feeling good that I thought I had many friends congratulating us on our new addition. As I shared some of the comments left on my Facebook page my wife was eager to share the comments left on her page. As I opened up her profile I was astonished to see over 50 people had commented and that wasn’t including all the likes and pokes. I thought to myself…..”Is this a regular occurrence or are the comments so high just because we had a baby”. It seems, and I may be exaggerating a little, that Christie can post any mundane experience like “it’s snowing, I ate an apple, I found a quarter” and at a minimum she will have 5 comments and 5 likes. I told her I wanted to start posting on her account so I too could enjoy the instant gratification of receiving multiple Facebook posts instantaneously…..later she changed her password.

This post is not just based on Facebook. Have you ever tried to go to Wal-Mart with Christie in Saratoga Springs? It is like a pizza walking into fat camp. People cannot get enough of her. We are stopped in every isle; pictures are taken with past first graders, and let’s not forget about the strangers who stop her to ask “Who does your hair?” In fact, it’s gotten so out of hand we have to make packs in the car before we ever step into Wal-Mart that she is only allowed to talk to anyone she knows for 1 minute or less. So far she has failed miserably keeping the pack.

Not only is Christie great with people….but did you know she is the animal whisperer as well? We have a cat named Lemon. If you are friends with us you probably have heard the story of our poor unfortunate cat. In fact, I think Christie did a blog about the poor animal. Every night, just before we go to bed, Lemon the cat jumps on the bed for her nightly rub down. She slowly nestles in between me and my wife with her face pointing towards Christie and her butt pointing straight towards me. I have tried petting, cat food, turning her around by force but despite my best efforts the cat always returns to the same position (well maybe a little further from me but facing the same way) giving me the shaft. It’s an insult since I am the one who cleans her litter box (is it true that pregnant and/or nursing women can’t change the litter box or is Christie taking advantage of the situation?) feeds her, and lets her out. However, Lemon’s infatuation with Christie has its advantages. I do not wake up throughout the night by Lemon’s belly dragging back and forth across my head; I do not wake up with Lemon licking my hands; and I certainly do not wake up with Lemon lying on my chest. I keep telling Christie it is a small price to pay for your popularity with the cat.

So why is every living creature enamored with my wife? It’s probably because has a heart of gold…..let me explain. Christie is the type of person who says she is sorry after beating you in scrabble. She is the type of person that will chase you down in Wal-Mart to say hello and ask you how you are doing. She is the type of person who cries during animal planet. She is the type of person who leaves you notes on the door wishing you good luck. She is the type of person who makes anyone she meets feel like they are the most important person in the world at that moment. I know she has won me over….I am just tired of sharing her with everyone else. So watch out Ray Ramono……….because I believe you have been replaced. In my eyes…..Everybody Loves Christie.

7 comments:

sinika said...

Pizza in a fat camp! Ha! This was so sweet Scott. It's true that everyone loves Christie... she's just so sweet and likable- not to mention GORGEOUS! All those Swalbergs have something going for them that people just LOVE them! I guess we can count ourselves lucky that we got to marry them! :)

Lindsey Walker said...

This is so so sweet Scott. And yes, everyone does love Christie, and always has. She is one of the most beautiful, and sweetest person I have ever met. She knows how to make you feel like a million bucks! I still remember compliments she gave me clear back in high school. I have always looked up to and admired Christie.

Mama Swalz said...

Yes, Everyone loves Christie! I agree! She used to come home from school when she was young crying because SOMEONE ELSE got in trouble... that's my tender hearted Christie! I love her too! And all my other kids ... and their spouses too :)

The Andersens said...

Scottie- this was SO Sweet! and I TOTALLY agree with you that everybody DOES LOVE Christie! Shes my favorite... Thats hilarious about Lemons. You guys crack me up. Wish we lived closer...

Mrs. Ham said...

you both lucked out!

Steph said...

Oh Man! This was so cute, funny, and true!! Christie is the best.. and your not so bad yourself Scott.

Julie said...

What a sweet post! And you're right... everyone loves your wife. She's such a sweetheart and is such an amazing friend to my sister Wendy. We all love her dearly! Congrats on all the fun things going on in your life right now. You both have such a great sense of humor! Loved the pizza joke too!