Tuesday, March 1, 2011

94 days

I can't believe the babymoon is over.  I swear I just had a baby? Where did the time go?? I can't tell you how much I dreaded going back and leaving my baby girl.  I guess I was completely in love with snuggling and holding and kissing that little girl of mine every waking moment of the day.  Just ask Scottie.  Anytime the topic of me going back to school came up I immediately felt a huge knot in my stomach and got teary eyed at the thought.  I was completely in denial even up to the weekend before I had to go back.  I just knew there had to be some way I could stay home with Gabby.  But unfortunately Monday rolled around and I found myself packing her up and yes bawling my eyes out getting ready, don't know why I even bothered putting on mascara, then bawled some more as I put her in her car seat, then I put her in the car, bawled my eyes out some more, dropped her off at my cute sister in laws, bawled again, and then drove my lonely self to school....all while you guessed it, bawling my eyes out.  The second I got to school I was totally disoriented!! The second I saw this I was once again in tears. 

It had then hit me.  I was really back.  But I could not for the life of me remember my routine or daily schedule, and entering into my classroom that was occupied by my wonderful sub for two months for some strange reason just didn't feel like my classroom anymore. As  I hurried to get things ready for the day, I finally pulled myself together and walked out to the back to pick up my kiddos.  Thank goodness they were so excited to see me because I sure did not want to be there.  But their warm hugs, smiles, cards, chocolates, and teddy bears (for me and the babe) brightened me up and as the day went on I eventually started getting back into my routine.  By the time lunch rolled around I headed to my classroom to pump (yes I felt like I was a cow on a dairy farm ...something about pumping just doesn't feel right.  Maybe it was the fact that I was afraid some peeping Tom was lurking outside my window trying to peak through the blinds I made sure were shut completely or maybe it was the fact that I was in this huge classroom worried the whole time that the door didn't lock and my kids would come barging in because they forgot their coat only to find their exposed teacher.....not a sight I'm sure anyone would like to see.  I so much would have rather been in the comforts of my own room snuggling my little babe.   Thank goodness for my darling sister in law, Sini, who is a fabulous mother of three adorable boys, who then sent me a cute picture of my baby girl. 

 (can you tell she just loves these jammies? I think I have a million pictures of her in them haha)

Oh how it made me so excited to get home to see her. And don't you worry.  The second that school bell rang and I could go home, I raced out the door and sped out of the parking lot just as fast as my maternity leave came and went!   I sure was hoping that every cop in the area was turning a head as I zoomed by them and pulled into my sister in laws driveway.  I didn't even get a chance to knock, when she opened the door to greet me with my baby girl in her arms!  Oh how lovely it was to finally hold her!  I can't believe how much I missed her!  Finally the knot in my stomach and the feeling that I was forgetting something or I had lost something all day, was gone!  One thing I am extremely grateful for is my loving family.  While I am at school I know my little girl will be snuggled by the best parents in the world: My mama, my sister in law, and my mother in law.  I couldn't ask for better babysitters.  They of course love her just as much as I do so I know that she will be taken care of and that they will snuggle her and kiss her and talk to her while I am gone.   I sure love my baby G and I do love my first graders.  In fact my friend Natalie told me one thing that helped her when she went back to school after having her baby was knowing that one day her little boy would be going to school and that she would want a teacher that cared for him as much as she does.  So in return, one day Gabby will be in first grade and I will one day be one of those parents who wants the best for her.  So I will try to be the best teacher I cab while I am at school and the best mother when I am at home.  But lets hope it goes by fast because I really can't wait for summer break!  94 days right?  I can do it!  I can do it! 


Gabe, Melissa, and Jace said...

Oh I can't believe you're back to work already! That's crazy! It's so hard leaving your child but I promise it gets easier, atleast for me it did. Especially the fact that you know she is well taken care of. I felt like i cherished my time with Jace so much more since my time was limited. You'll do great, and yes, summer break isn't that far away. That's so sweet that your class was so excited to see you. Good luck with the transition! Luv Ya!

The Peterson's said...

It does get easier. I would still miss Cairo everyday but once routine was established all went better. You are an amazing mom and teacher!

Mama Swalz said...

I feel terrible telling you what a wonderful day Gabby and I had together. She was so snuggly and sweet. I just love her to pieces! She is priceless!

The Andersens said...

You are the cutest mom! 94 days will fly right by... I need to come up and meet little miss gabby, she is precious

Crystal said...

I love hearing your thoughts Christie! I have loved having my mom watch Gavin because I know he is in the best hands. I think that helps when you have to leave them. You are such a great teacher and I heard from some of your kiddos about how much they missed you while you were gone. You can do it! Hang in there!